Blindsided

February 1, 2013 by 40 Comments

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I lived the early years of my life wearing afraid like a worn out sweatshirt hanging off my shoulder. Afraid to come home after school, dreading the descent of the long gravel driveway to the front door of the house hidden in the woods for what I might find inside.

I slept with my head underneath the covers at night sweating off the fear of being alone. Grasped the frayed ends of afraid with one hand cupped to my pajama chest and let my fingers open on brave when I told the stranger that followed my mother home to leave my house.

I walked the hallways afraid I wouldn’t measure up, make the grade, be found out or realize my dreams.

Then I left that sweatshirt lying in a heap on the back side of the dilapidated barn door of my youth. Choosing courage over staying stuck.

I pushed out my chest and held up truth to pages of lies the generations before me believed. And followed my dreams.

Because Jesus didn’t come so we could be afraid. He came so we would have life.

I woke up this morning beside the man who loves me. Kissed the kids I bore. I sat in the stillness, closed my eyes and couldn’t remember the last time I uttered the word afraid.

I’ve been blindsided by redemption.

Joining Lisa-Jo for Five Minute Friday (because it seems like that’s all the time I have right now) for the one word prompt: Afraid.

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Because Failure Is Not Your Fate

January 16, 2013 by 30 Comments

rbscarlett

I carried my yellow Tinkerbell cup of steamy tea back into the bedroom, sat down on the bed and pushed my pajama legs back under the sheets still warm with body heat. We slept in. H and I savored the moments of quiet under a halo of slanted light streaming dust particles through the slats on the shutters. And we watched CBS Sunday Morning together.

Do you believe God can speak to you through morning television? 

I do.

I listened to Nick Vujicic, the man without arms or legs tell about God’s goodness in the midst of his seemingly hopeless situation; heard how Scarlett Johansson overcame early rejection in her career due to her “unfeminine” husky voice. And just when I thought I understood the depth of God’s love, he said, “But there’s more.”

They chose to approach life with focused determination founded on what they have; instead of fate based on what they lack.

And I’m pondering what God is saying to me through their stories. How I can speak life into those people discarded by circumstance like dry bones the way Ezekiel did. Breathe life into my own dry places by believing in the power of God’s restoration.

So I prophesied, just as he commanded me. The breath entered them and they came alive! ~Ezekiel 37:10

I gently push my tea onto the bedside table with my reading glasses and phone, wipe away tears with the corner of my blue bed sheet. Then I lean over and kiss H, my Ezekiel.

On days of discouragement, he restores the pulse of my faith to hope again.

Who are your Ezekiels?

Tomorrow I will sit across from a young girl I’m mentoring and talk with her about destiny. She was chosen for me because of the dry bones she carries, but I believe there is life inside the sinews waiting to come alive.

“Watch this: I’m bringing the breath of life to you and you’ll come to life. I’ll attach sinews to you, put meat on your bones, cover you with skin, and breathe life into you. You’ll come alive and you’ll realize that I am God!” ~Ezekiel 37:5-6

Who needs you to speak life into their dry bones?

This post is inspired by Chapter 6, The Wonder of Restoration in Wonderstruck by Margaret Feinberg.

Linking with Ann, Laura and Jen.

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What Are You Waiting For?

June 24, 2012 by 28 Comments

Muscles ache from working hand to shovel to rake to trowel and I remember that I am dust. That my days number the way he counts them on my head, from beginning to end. Birds build nests, squirrels bury acorns, trees sprawl green leafy canopy in summer’s sun to fulfill created purpose. So what keeps me from fulfilling mine. Are you fulfilling yours?

Do birds bury acorns, squirrels lay eggs?

May we live, you and I, wisdom-full in the counting of days. Let’s satifsy our spot in the world  as written wet ink in the book of life. He’s turned the page to start the next chapter. So what are we waiting for?

Linking with these friends too: Scripture & Snapshot and Fresh Brewed Sunday.

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Redemption’s Imperfect Clarity

June 17, 2012 by 16 Comments

Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

~ I Corinthians 13:12

I stood in front of this vine draped window of beauty at Muncaster Castle in Ravenglass, England, envisioned women in crinolines and lace staring out of it in centuries past. How their choices of fierce determination tell part of my story too.

It’s a curious thing how a girl fostered in reckless childhood could stand in the dim reflection of miraculous destiny and suddenly see that her Saviour was standing behind her all along.

May we hold on to the promise of clarity in the murky reflections of life’s circumstances, knowing He stands waiting with a mirror, when it is time to see.

Happy Sunday Friends! 

 

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Touching Destiny

May 20, 2012 by 35 Comments

It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.

Ephesians 1:11-12, The Message

Several days ago my hands touch hallowed walls of this Anglican church given to my ancestors, the Pennington’s, around 1050 AD. I linger long over the grassy graves of the faithful that trod this sacred soil. Step on the richness of their history and wonder how I might mirror their reflection.

He knew that I would hold my breath in wonder on the grounds of Muncaster Castle in Ravenglass England. That I would worship Him alongside angels of destiny, sit in the seat of the faithful, feel small in the impint of ancient souls on this very day.

Over one thousand years ago, he had his eye on me, on you, to fulfill His purposes in everything and everyone. And knowing that makes life worth living.

Praying on this Sabbath, that you touch destiny, receive a revelation of who you are.

Happy Sunday Friends!

 

 

 

Linking with Scripture & Snapshot, Fresh Brewed Sunday, Sweet Shot Tuesday

 

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Because We’re Better This Way

April 20, 2012 by 51 Comments

We cut the cake on together the day we sat in the car in the church parking lot and cried over destiny. When the pastor approached and asked you, the one with the architectural degree, if you had ever thought about ministry. His question unlocks the hope dream of future. We walk through the threshold of call, arm and arm.

We pack the moving van eight times, shake the hands of strangers in each new town, hang pictures, do laundry and pick out a refrigerator on the way to give birth to our first child . . .  side by side.

Each new position of authority, office to decorate, leaders to host, conference to lead, sermon to share; they are mine too.

Each job change, disappointment in friendship, milestone reached, ministry pioneered, words recognized by strangers, dream realized; they are yours too.

Their first words, first steps, tears shed, sleepless nights, angry fits, and side splitting laughter; we carry them in the pocket square of the heart together.

We have sprained our ankles on the cracks of life and braced ourselves leaning into shoulders. Sighed deeply in tangles of circumstances without answers, and laughed joy in redemption.

And for this girl who grew up between the torn page of two hearts in the first chapter of her life, who watched the world spin on the sidelines of alone, wondering if together only exists in the clouds of floating dreams and idealistic eyes. I am thankful for you my husband, the way we do life joined by the extended rubber band of union, stretching past our comfort zones and resting in faith. Together.

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. 11 Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? 12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. ~Ecc. 4:9-12

Joining Lisa-Jo for Five Minute Friday with the one word prompt: Together.

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When Destiny Interrupts Your Breakfast

March 23, 2012 by 32 Comments

I was still in my robe and wet hair on the bed, eating breakfast from the room service tray when the phone rang. She apologized for what she was going to ask before I even knew the request. Said she knew it was last minute but they had some changes in the schedule and could I, would I please be willing to introduce Kay Warren before she spoke in a main session this morning.

Stand up in front of a couple thousand people in a ballroom and introduce her.

And the night before, the way God showed up in a hotel conference room among friends in a chance meeting with the son whose father led me to Christ thirty years earlier, it gave me the courage to say yes, I will do it.

Because if God can bring your past to collide with your present in a matter of moments, to show how much He loves you,  then He can give the courage to do something you feel incapable of doing.

I met Kay in the ready room, holding the paper with a few lines about her life, just in case someone didn’t know the woman who is a household name in the Christian world. And I thought, is this all I am to say about someone that sells millions of books, travels around the world, touches countless souls for Christ?

We all stood quiet among the bottled water and fruit trays watching three assistants pull wires through her suit jacket, around hair sprayed perfect, while going over notes at the same time.  All the while, she stays focused mentally between questions, like being saturated in the afterglow of His presence in the holy of holies.

Jesus pulled back the veil, let me see behind the stage of the mantle of spiritual authority that he gives to those He chooses, and I understood the fear of the Lord in a new way.

An assistant asked us to gather for a photo, like something checked off the to-do list. Afterward, we stood in a circle holding hands, asked God for His will to be done. And when I closed my eyes, He said, “You’re a writer Shelly, just introduce her the way you would write the first paragraph of a story.”

I stood at the podium, light blinding the view of the crowd beyond the first two rows in the expansive room. I could see her clearly seated there to my right. She looked at me with a confident destiny smile.

My voice echoed loud through the microphone, but I didn’t care. For some reason, standing there at the podium, I felt more like myself than I ever had.

Linking with Lisa-Jo for Five Minute Friday with the one word prompt: Loud. And it is always so interesting to see what comes to mind with one word.

 

 

 

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